Automatic Girlfriend - Chapter 1

“This is so gross.” I sighed, staring down at the girl lying on my bed. “Why do I have to be so shameless and cheap.”

She was just lying there, naked, her mouth slightly agape, her eyes open and unblinking. No… she wasn’t a dead hooker. Actually, she was never alive in the first place. She was one of those pricey sex dolls you’ve heard about on the internet. I was walking home from work and I saw a leg poking out of a nearby garbage can. Saying I was distressed would be an understatement. I was convinced I had stumbled upon a murder victim!

Fortunately, I did the horror movie cliché and looked first before calling 9-1-1. What I found in the trash can was a complete sex doll. I had always thought about getting one of these things, but they were way too pricey. Although it almost looked real, these dolls always had just enough uncanny valley that I never felt satisfied. Saying that this doll had almost none of that. If she wasn’t staring with unblinking eyes unmovingly, I’d have thought she was real. Well, the skin wasn’t quite real skin and it wasn’t warm, but for a virgin like me, that was still unnerving. Either way, I wouldn’t let a deal like this pass! I wrapped the thing up in a trash bag and then carried it home with me.

Sure, I received a few suspicious or strange looks carrying what looked like a dead body home over my shoulder. However, most of the people in the neighborhood recognized me as being that guy who dumpster-dived after work. After college, I got a job that paid about 1/3 of what I was expecting to make. With all those loans to pay, I really had to tighten my belt. One of the ways I did that was getting into the trash. One man’s trash was another man’s treasure. That was my parent’s motto every year when they held their annual garage sale. I took that to heart and started literally picking through other men’s trash.

If I found something that looked valuable, I’d clean it up and resell it online. No one ever realized that my stuff was recovered from the trash, and they got to enjoy something far cheaper than they would new. My refurbishing was top notch too. I even got various paints and cleaners and was quite good at making things that looked destroyed working again. My favorite thing to fix was vacuum cleaners. I couldn’t tell you how many people trashed their vacuum just because of a clogged tube.

Ah, well, this sex doll wasn’t a vacuum. How was I going to clean this thing? Was it okay to toss it in the bathtub? As I checked over her, she looked pretty clean. I had been expecting faded paint, maybe a crack here, a dent there, you know, all kinds of defects. Instead, this sex doll looked almost pristine. She had curly brown hair. Her dimensions were the stuff of fantasies, with a round bottom and big boobs, but they weren’t too bad as to look ridiculous. Her lips were nice and pert, although they were open in an ‘o’ for likely obvious reasons. Her eyes were possibly her best part. They were violet, and looked almost real, despite violet not being a very common color.

Pulling out some bleach and mixing it into my own cleaning cocktail, I put on a medical mask and a pair of yellow rubber gloves. Then, I pulled out my handy toothbrush and sponge and got to work. Starting at her feet, I scrubbed every inch of her. I made sure to get between the toes. I attacked every nook and cranny, scrubbing with extreme enthusiasm. I never would have called myself a clean freak… I’d never be able to dive into dumpsters if I was, but when I got into the mode of preserving something, I was fully concentrated.

That was, of course, until I reached her vagina. It had no hair, a small slit, and of course a pink nub of a clitoris at the top. I’d never seen a vagina except in images. However, it was an attractive looking vagina if I went by those standards.

“I wonder if it’s anatomically correct?” I wondered as I stuck a finger inside.

I immediately pulled my finger out and made a face. It was wet inside! I stuck out my tongue and nearly gagged. A wet pussy might be arousing in normal circumstances, but this was a used sex doll. Whatever was “wet” inside there, I didn’t want to know!

“Hmm… how do you remove it…” I frowned as I noticed something that didn’t match the model online I was looking at.

This doll seemed completely custom. I couldn’t find any model that matched this from any of the websites. This one seemed particularly high class as well. It was very limber, with many joints, even in the fingers and toes. As I moved it around, I could tell that it was made almost to replicate the range of motion of a human body. Except, now I noticed that where most sex dolls had a removable vagina this one had built it without that compartment. Her skin was completely smooth where a vagina compartment should have screwed out. It was the same for the butt and as far as I could tell, the mouth.

“If you can’t pull it out, how do you clean it?” I made another face.

My thoughts were this must have been made by some eccentric millionaire. He probably had the money to hire someone to personally clean this doll. As to why it was in the garbage? Maybe he had worn out the holes. If you can’t replace them, then naturally the only choice was to throw the whole thing away and buy a new one. Poor doll, it wasn’t its fault it couldn’t repair its body like a real woman.

I did the best I could to clean it up. There were still men who might want a doll, even if she was a little loose. Loose is relative anyway. Maybe this guy just had a tiny penis? I chuckled about that as I started to clean all the folds in this vagina. I’d let them worry about the clean-up after the first time they used it themselves. As for me, I wasn’t particularly bothered cleaning it up. It really did feel realistic, not that I knew what a real pussy felt like, but it was soft and gushy around my fingers. I found myself a bit curious about what it’d feel like to my cock. I was thinking it’d be a step up from my hand.

“Damn, she’s tight,” I said, finding myself unable to get more than two fingers inside her.

On second thought, I didn’t think my penis would fit inside this. Maybe this guy who had her before me had a micro-penis. Although, I recalled vaginas were meant to stretch enough for a baby to fit through. Maybe it’d stretch to my size? I was lost in thought as I considered what it might feel like to be inside a woman, stretching her open. Before long, I had completely cleaned her out.

“I suppose I need to do the same to her butt?” I blushed.

I wasn’t the kind of person who considered anal as an option. I was way too vanilla for that. As I was feeling around her rectum, I realized it went quite deep, like a real rectum. I was to the end of my toothbrush when I realized I could go even deeper.

“Ah… s-sorry…” I pulled the toothbrush out of her butt. “Gaw… it’s just a doll, why is it awkward!”

After cleaning her butt, I moved my way up. Although her butt was far cleaner than a human butt anyway, I still replaced the toothbrush. It was the principle of the thing! Her upper body was easier to clean. I was surprised by the weight of her boobs. Like everything else on her, they felt incredibly real. I made sure to clean them extra well. It wasn’t because I was a pervert that liked fondling them! This was purely to make them clean and shiny.

I kept on working up her body, drying off her lower parts before moving to her upper. Finally, I reached her mouth. I was surprised to see that the teeth were hard.

“Seriously? Isn’t that a bad idea?”

A mouth was for chewing, after all. So, as I understood it, women had to get a lot of practice to keep their teeth from agitating the guy during a BJ. Thus, what was up with this doll? She had a full set of hard teeth. They weren’t some fake rubber or removable or anything! The level this guy went to obtain realism was ridiculous. All you had to do is accidentally knock her head during a blowjob, and with no muscles to resist, she’d bit his cock right off!

Well, I didn’t need to worry about it. That was some other man’s issue. I decided I was going to sell her. Although she was very realistic, there was a limit to realism. Without the ability to function as a real woman, all of her issues would be a giant inconvenience. Well, it’s not like you could expect a doll to clean itself or to control itself during a blowjob.

“Ah, what’s this?”

While I was cleaning her tongue, I noticed a piece of folded-up paper under it. I unfolded it, then again, and then again. My eyes widened as a small book unfolded. It looked way too small in her mouth to be this large once unfolded. I frowned at the mysterious booklet in my hands.

“Automatic girlfriend.” I read the words written across the main page. “Just what the heck was an automatic girlfriend?”