Entry #5
Dear Diary,
Today was like a whirlwind of emotions, and I’m not sure if I should feel excited or a bit down. So, you know how I’ve been dreaming about being an actress and all? Well, today was my first-ever audition, and let me tell you, it was both nerve-wracking and kinda magical.
I put on my favorite sparkly top and my lucky sneakers, trying to channel all the confidence I could find. The audition room was this buzzing hive of excitement, filled with aspiring actors and actresses who seemed like they’d just stepped out of a glamorous magazine. Seriously, diary, they looked like real-life princesses or something. I couldn’t help but feel a bit out of place.
As I waited for my turn, I overheard some of the girls talking about their experiences and all the cool auditions they’ve been to. It made me feel like such a newbie, like I’m just a tiny fish in this vast ocean of talent. And, diary, they were so pretty! It was like a beauty pageant or a movie premiere right there in the waiting room.
When it was finally my turn to audition, my heart was doing this crazy dance. I recited my lines, tried to emote like a pro, and hoped that the casting director saw some spark in me. But, deep down, I couldn’t shake the feeling that the other girls were, like, way prettier and more polished than me. I felt kinda plain in comparison, you know?
Leaving the audition, I couldn’t help but wonder if I even stood a chance. The city is full of talented and stunning people, and I’m just this small-town girl trying to make her dreams come true. I know it’s not all about looks, but it’s hard not to compare myself to the glamorous girls around me.
Tonight, as I lay in bed, I looked at myself in the mirror and tried to find the sparkle that makes me unique. Fluffington (my bed) felt like a comforting friend, and I whispered to myself that I’ve got this. Maybe I’m not the prettiest, but I’ve got heart, right?
I’m determined to keep chasing my dreams, even if it means navigating through a sea of stunning faces. Lights, camera, self-confidence – that’s what I need more of.
But diary, there’s more to this story. As I was lying here, trying to calm my nerves, I found myself thinking about Mr. Dreamboat, the teacher from my acting class. He’s always on my mind, and today was no different. I imagined him watching my audition, seeing the passion and dedication in my eyes. It made me feel a bit better, like maybe he’d see the real me beneath the surface.
I started to wonder what it would be like if he were here, encouraging me. Maybe he’d tell me that I have what it takes, that my heart and determination are what matter most. I let my mind wander, imagining his hands gently resting on my shoulders, his voice soft and reassuring. In my fantasy, he leaned in, his breath warm against my ear, and whispered words of encouragement. I felt a shiver run down my spine, a mix of excitement and longing.
As I lay here, I let my hand wander, tracing the curves of my body, imagining it was his touch. I found myself reaching for “Sparkly Joe” in my nightstand. Sparkly Joe is the name of my close friend. I had him since high school. His is bright pink, covered in glitter, and about six inches. I bought him from a novelty shop. I had been so scared they’d card me, but the girl behind the corner smirked and didn’t ask questions. Sparkly Joe had been there for me through my most hormonal times as a teen.
With a playful grin, I turned on the vibration function and imagined Mr. Dreamboat’s hands guiding me, my hands stroking as if it was Mr. Dreamboat himself I was holding. I slowly slipped Sparkly Joe between my legs, feeling the cool, smooth surface against my skin. I let out a soft moan as the vibrations sent waves of pleasure through me. I closed my eyes, picturing Mr. Dreamboat’s face, his eyes filled with desire and admiration. I moved Sparkly Joe in slow, teasing circles, building the sensation until I was gasping for breath.
The room seemed to spin as I lost myself in the fantasy, my body responding to every touch, every imagined caress. I could feel the heat building inside me, my muscles tensing with each wave of pleasure. I slid Sparkly Joe inside, feeling the vibrations intensify, pushing me closer and closer to the edge.
My mind was a blur of fantasies, each one more intense than the last. I imagined Mr. Dreamboat’s hands on my body, his lips exploring every inch of my skin. The thought sent shivers down my spine, and I could feel my body responding, my hips arching to meet the rhythm of Sparkly Joe. I let out a soft cry as the pleasure peaked, my body shuddering with release. I lay there for a moment, catching my breath, a smile playing on my lips. It was a moment of pure fantasy, and I lost myself in the sensation, my body responding to every touch, every imagined caress.
I know it’s just a crush, diary, but it feels so real and intense. I can’t help but wonder what it would be like if he ever noticed me the way I notice him. Would he see the real me, or would he just see another student with a crush? Only time will tell, but for now, I’ll keep dreaming and hoping that maybe, just maybe, he feels the same way.
Hoping for a confidence boost,
Wawchan